While anal sex is becoming more common, many women are still reluctant to give it a try. This can be because of fear, pain or a feeling of pressure.
To help get her comfortable with anal, start with light butt play and slowly move your way up to penetration. Make sure to use lots of lubricant!
1. Get her relaxed
Some people think women hate anal sex, but this could not be more untrue. Many women love anal sex and even find it more pleasurable than traditional sex. However, like all sexual activity, it is important that both partners are relaxed and ready to take things to the next level. If you are pushing your wife into anal before she is ready, it will almost certainly end in failure.
Getting your wife relaxed is one of the most important aspects of anal play, but it can be difficult to know where to start. A good place to start is by creating a chilled anal play area, which can help her feel more comfortable and at ease. You can also try stimulating her anal opening using your mouth, fingers, or sex toys before moving on to penetration. And remember to use a lot of lube – the anus does not produce its own lubrication, so it is essential that there is plenty of artificial wetness available.
Another thing to keep in mind is that anal sex can be very intense and uncomfortable, so it’s important not to rush things. If your wife is nervous or tight, it will be much harder for you to get in and more painful for her. So take your time and give her a chance to work up the courage to let you in.
2. Make it a special occasion
If your wife has already tried anal before and didn’t like it, there could be a number of reasons why. She might have had a bad experience or she may be worried about getting dirty or being hurt. The important thing is to try to understand what turned her off so that you can change it for the next time. If she’s squeamish about cleanliness, for example, you can try taking her to the bathroom before you do anal play or even give her some time to get herself ready by herself in the shower. If she’s worried about hurting herself, you can reassure her that you will be very gentle and use lots of lubricant.
Finally, it’s best to take your time and enter her slowly so that you don’t cause her any pain. The anus is sensitive, and her muscles will tense up if you go in too quickly or if your technique isn’t right. The more she orgasms, the more likely she is to be open to trying it again.
Of course, if she decides that anal isn’t for her, it’s fine. Just don’t pressure her or try to convince her to change her mind. Instead, be supportive and encourage her to explore other ways to have sex with you. You might find that you are both more satisfied by these other methods.
3. Don’t force it
It is important to avoid forcing your wife to do anal, especially if she hasn’t expressed interest in it. If you ask her to do anal and she’s not into it, she might feel obligated to agree even though she doesn’t want to, which can make her uncomfortable and lead to a bad experience for both of you.
Also, don’t spring the request on her while you two are already doing anal or vaginal sex. This could cut the pleasure short and make her resentful of you, especially if she doesn’t enjoy it. Instead, broach the subject in a private setting outside of the bedroom so that she has time to get excited about it.
When you do bring up the topic, be honest with her about what you’re looking for. Anal sex can be uncomfortable for the “receiving end” if it’s not relaxed, and the anus will tighten if she is nervous or scared. It’s best to have long foreplay so that she can relax and let her sphincter loosen up.
During this foreplay, you can use your mouth, fingers and sex toys to stimulate her anal opening before you stick your penis in there, and make sure that you have plenty of lube on hand. Unlike the vagina, anal doesn’t create its own lubrication, so you’ll need plenty of it to ensure that things move along smoothly.
4. Give her a chance
You should be prepared for her to say no, but it’s important to remember that boundaries are sacred and require respect. Don’t force her to do something she doesn’t want to, as this will only cause tension between you.
If she is hesitant, try to talk to her outside of the bedroom and find out what turns her off about anal sex. Maybe she is squeamish about the cleanliness or is worried it would hurt, but you can try to help her overcome those fears.
To make it more comfortable, start with foreplay and move slowly into penetration. It’s also a good idea to use lots of lube and consider buying some lubrication designed for anal play to ensure the best experience. The anal opening is much smaller than the vagina and can be more sensitive, so it’s important to take it slow and gently at first.
Once she is comfortable with the feeling, you can start moving faster and introduce sex toys to make it even more enjoyable. It’s a good idea to start with small ones or ones that are soft, like silicone or latex, as these will be gentler on the anal and are easy to clean. And don’t forget to use a vibrator, as this can really add to the pleasure and help her relax.
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